


Expectations

by Light7



Category: Hellsing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-11-24
Packaged: 2019-08-04 21:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16354442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Light7/pseuds/Light7
Summary: Seras decides that Alucard is not 'Dracula'. AU setting/Cannon divergence – Seras realises Alucard is Dracula shortly after the Valentines attack. Before Brazil.





	1. Chapter 1

Expectations.

Disclaimer: Hellsing belongs people who are not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create. Although I would like to own Alucard . . . then he’d be mine. 

Rating: G

Authoress note: Seras decides that Alucard is not ‘Dracula’. AU setting/Cannon divergence – Seras realises Alucard is Dracula shortly after the Valentines attack. Before Brazil. 

* \/ * /\ * \/ * /\ *

“Dracula isn’t real,” Seras said firmly, walking into the kitchen to find Walter alone. 

“Oh?” Walter frowned at her looking away from the cutting board. “Don’t let your master hear you say that, he gets funny about unexpected things and I can just imagine that questioning his existence would be one of those things.” 

“That’s not what I mean Walter and you know it,” Seras said. “Have they still not replaced the kitchen staff?” 

“Clearly not,” Walter gestured to the empty room. “But it is no bother, I can mange a simple thing like this.” 

“Can I help?” Seras offered, Walter shook his head. “There is nothing for you to do, I am almost finished here. But more to the point, what do you mean?” Seras sat down to watch Walter work. 

“I’ve read the book,” she started. “and I’ve seen hundred of movies and he’s always portrayed as this smooth, charismatic man.” 

“Your master can be charismatic when it suits him,” Walter said.

“I’m sure he can,” Seras admitted. “But he has to put effort into it, in the book and the films its effortless. The books and films portray a creature of effortless charm and romance, something no woman or man could say no to even if they wanted to.” 

“How many times have you said no to your master?” Walter said. “I’ve managed half a dozen and I’ve known him for years.” 

“You’re being deliberately argumentative,” Seras muttered. “Master is a psychopath, he’s not effortlessly charming or delightful, he’s insane.” 

“Well, yes,” Walter said slowly turning to face Seras. “The book did not include all of his personality traits that is true and perhaps it did exaggerate those it chose to include. But that book was written with a purpose in mind and an honest depiction of your master was not said purpose.” 

“Purpose?” Seras asked

“Yes, it made your master fictional. You think Abraham was the only vampire hunter after him? No. Once the book was published your master became a made up monster that no self-respecting vampire hunter would pursue. Abraham got to keep him to himself without worry of theft.” 

“That sounds, well awful actually,” Seras said. 

“Abraham wasn’t a nice man,” Walter turned back to his chopping. “A nice man could not be able to capture Dracula.” 

“I see,” Seras said. 

“But, if I may ask, why the sudden realisation and why so angry?” Walter asked. Seras looked down at the table top, drawing circles on it with her finger while she tried to put her words into an order that didn’t sound ridiculous. 

“To be honest I’m not sure,” she said. “It’s just, I read the book when I was younger and I had an image in my head of what he was, meeting him now, he’s just not what I was expecting,” Seras shrugged. “So I thought my memory was bad and I read it again and it just makes him sound so…” 

“Suave?” Walter provided, Seras nodded. 

“You’re disappointed?” the butler asked, Seras blinked at the question. She wasn’t sure, she was irritated but was she disappointed? “Please Miss Victoria tell me what’s wrong really.” Seras sighed and gave in. 

“We’ve had some new recruits start this week,” she said slowly, feeling out her words before speaking. “Two of them were women, and I thought I could finally have some company but all they cared about was bloody Dracula,” she growled before putting on a squeaky voice. “Did he take you flying? I bet it was romantic, did he take you out for exotic meals and take you dancing?” Seras glared at the butler. “Can you imagine Master dancing? It’s just wrong!” 

“Calm down Miss Victoria,” Walter said, coughing into his hand to cover a laugh, Seras glared harder at him. 

“It’s not funny, Walter,” she said. “I tried to tell them. I tried to explain that he’s not a romantic tragic monster, he’s a blood thirsty lunatic.” 

“Charming,” Alucard materialised from the shadows behind the fridge. “To think I hear my name and come here to find you bragging about bad mouthing me to the new recruits.” 

“Don’t worry,” Seras rolled her eyes. “They didn’t listen, your unrivalled image of a charming Prince is still intact.” 

“Good,” Alucard settled across from her. 

“Bloody stupid book,” Seras grumbled. 

“To be honest I think Stoker had a little-bitty crush on me,” Alucard gave her what he obviously thought was a charming smile, it wasn’t, there were to many teeth involved for it to be anything but frightening. 

“Not working,” Seras said. 

“You know me to well,” Alucard huffed. 

“I don’t now you at all,” Seras corrected. “I just know what you aren’t.” 

“I don’t understand why the new recruits having a misconception about me would bother you so much, surely you should feel honoured to know something of the truth when all other know lies.” 

“I think Miss Victoria is frustrated,” Walter joined them at the table having dealt with the dinner. 

“Everyone who reads the book will think you’re something that you’re not,” Seras muttered putting her head in her folded arms on the table. 

“Maybe that was the idea,” Alucard said. “Like Walter said earlier.” 

“How long were you eavesdropping?” Walter asked but was ignored. 

“The book made me into something that could not possibly be real, something fictional, and something that no educated man would ever question the validity of.” 

“Or make the connection,” Walter said. “Those who did meet you would never connect you to the character in Stoker’s book.” 

“Exactly,” Alucard said. “as I said you should feel honoured, you know the truth. Would you rather have the pretty lie?” 

“No,” Seras admitted. “I’d rather have the truth any day, even if it is disappointing.” 

“You are disappointed,” Walter said. 

“A little I guess,” Seras shrugged. Alucard frowned. 

“It’s been years, decades even since someone was disappointed in me.” 

“Yeah well, I’m sure you’ll live,” Seras muttered. 

“Considering that I have been dead for centuries, no,” Alucard said. He watched Seras for a long moment before smirking. “If you are able to set your disappointment aside, who were these new recruits?” 

“Alucard,” Walter said. “No. You cannot go frightening the new recruits again.” The butler looked uncomfortable, “Integra gave me a very firm telling off last time you did that.” 

“But how else am I supposed to set the record straight and give poor police girl a chance to say I told you so?” Alucard purred at the aging butler. 

“Do not be using Miss Victoria as an excuse,” Walter grumbled, he watched as Seras began to smile and stood up. 

“Now Walter, you know I wouldn’t let him torment the new recruits,” Alucard raised an eyebrow at her. “But I do think I saw something interesting outside to distract him,” Seras tugged on Alucard’s arm. Walter sighed, two against one seemed very unfair. Seras grinned wider seeing Walter’s defeat “come on Master lets set the record straight.” 

End Chapter One

Please Review.

Authoress note: Thank you for reading, please comment/review, I’d love to hear what you think.

For information on published works and upcoming projects, release dates, as well as weekly blogs, check out www . katiemariewriter . co . uk


	2. Chapter Two

Expectations.  
Disclaimer: Hellsing belongs people who are not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create. Although I would like to own Alucard . . . then he’d be mine.   
Rating: G  
Authoress Note: Seras decides that Alucard is not ‘Dracula’. AU setting/Cannon divergence – Seras realises Alucard is Dracula shortly after the Valentines attack. Before Brazil. 

* \/ * /\ * \/ * /\ *

“Dracula isn’t real, and I’m going to prove this to you,” Seras said when she managed to find some of the new recruits, her grinning master in tow.

“You are cruel,” Alucard said, Seras frowned, his voice was … deeper? “Telling these people that I do not exist.” It was he was lowering his bloody voice. Sears frowned at him.

“Stop it,” she said, he gave what she assumed he thought was a bewildered and innocent look. 

“Stop what?” Alucard said as the recruits seemed to catch on who Seras was trying to introduce them to. 

“You’re Dracula!” one of the girls came forward, Seras thought her name might be Jane. 

“Yes,” Alucard dipped his head. 

“You’re doing something weird with your voice, you sound European, you’ve never sounded European before,” Seras said. 

“Nonsense,” Alucard flicked his hand in her direction dismissing her comments. Turning his attention back to the recruits he smiled keeping his mouth closed, “and you are?”

“Gemma,” the girl said, Seras corrected herself in her mind regarding the girl’s name. “So, um … this is really strange, like meeting a celebrity!” 

“I’m flattered,” Alucard said, his accent thick. 

“I don’t know what to say,” Gemma turned to her fellow recruits, they were all smiling but none of them spoke. 

“My Seras mentioned that you might have questions?” Alucard said. Seras felt her eye twitch since when was she ‘his’ Seras?! Normally it was Police girl this and police girl that. Seras suddenly had a profound understanding of how Integra must feel dealing with her master. 

“Did you drink her blood,” Gemma leaned forward as she spoke. 

“Of course,” Alucard widened his grin, showing more teeth but still not enough to make the smile as threatening as it could be. 

“Oh!” Gemma looked at Seras and raised her eyebrows, Seras felt her face turn red.

“Don’t say it like that, it wasn’t like that!” Seras snapped. “There was a hole in my chest the size of a football, that he put there.”

“He put a football in your chest?” Gemma said.

“No, he shot me at point blank range and then he ate me, it wasn’t cute or romantic, it hurt like hell and was terrifying.”

“But you were brave,” Alucard actually purred at her. Seras took a deep calming breath. “you trembled but you did not cry.” Gemma made an ‘aww’ sound. 

“I was in shock! Anyway, change the bloody subject.” Seras huffed. 

“Can you turn into a wolf?” one of the men called from the back of the small group. Alucard didn’t answer instead he became formless and out of the shadows formed the most handsome wolf Seras had ever seen. She grit her teeth as the recruits literally surged forward to look at the ‘handsome doggy’.

“Normally it's scary,” she said under her breath. “All eyes and teeth.” She felt her master look at her while his ears and head were petted. She could practically feel the smugness coming off of him in waves. She watched as he deliberately waited until on of the girls had her hands buried in the ruff of fur around his neck before changing back. As he grew in height her feet lifted off the ground. When he reformed fully he was holding her, bridal style and laughing. 

“Seras said you were scary,” the girl said as he put her down smirking. “She said that you weren’t like the books.”

“That is because Seras knows me too well,” Alucard said. 

“Nonsense, you’re a delight,” Gemma said. 

“No, he isn’t!” Seras started. “Its all a show to…” but she never finished the sentence, as the house alarm rang, calling all available soldiers to post. “Damn it,” she snapped as everyone headed down to dispatch and her master disappeared in a swirl of shadows, she could have sworn the shadows moved in a much more dramatic and grand way, she could have sworn there was even a sparkle or two as opposed to the usual copious eyes. 

She followed the recruits down to dispatch and stood to the side of the troop while Pip started relaying the orders. Integra stood in front of the troop but behind Pip, watching and waiting to see how the troop responded. 

“Apparently these are low-level vampires,” Pip said, his voice sticking on the word vampires, even after her display and Master’s arrival he seemed to be struggling with the idea. “We’ll do a standard search and sweep.” 

“Will we need all troops?” A man Seras did not recognise spoke up. The Wild Geese, while still ‘new’ to Hellsing, were not as new as the recruits that Seras had been trying to educate. 

“Yes,” Pip said. “I would rather have to much manpower than not enough.” 

“Seras,” Integra called out. Seras stood to attention. “Go along with them, educate them.” She glanced behind her to the shadows, Alucard strode forward. “You won’t be needed.” 

“Are you so certain?” Alucard purred, Seras grinned when Integra sneered at him, the appropriate response she thought to herself. Ha, can’t charm Integra. 

“To be honest I don’t care, do not cause me any problems just because you are bored.” Integra turned away from him and headed back to her office. Seras caught Alucard grinning at her and glared at him, his smile only widened obviously enjoying her frustration. Seras headed into the vans with the recruits relieved when her master did not follow her. She sat and waited for them to head out wondering if this was going to go in her favour or not. She doubted Alucard could keep up the ‘charming’ act for long, especially if there were things for him to kill. But he did seem to be enjoying winding her up, perhaps that would strengthen his resolve and let him prolong the act. 

“Do you think there’s three of them?” a voice snapped Seras out of her pondering. She glanced over and saw Gemma and a few of the recruits who had been witness to Alucard’s earlier display.

“Three?” one of the men said. “Three what?” 

“He’s supposed to have three… oh you know, three brides,” Gemma all but cackled. 

“Oh!” the man’s eyes widened a little before he grinned. “Well, aside from Seras, there is Integra.” 

“But she’s in charge,” another girl spoke up. 

“That could be for show,” Gemma said. “You know he could be like, the power behind the throne.” 

“Apparently he calls her master,” the man said. 

“Kinky,” Gemma laughed. 

“IT’S NOT KINKY!” Seras all but screamed making everyone in the van jump. “She is in charge and human. As far as I’m aware I am the only other vampire, there’s not three and I am not a bloody bride.” She stood up but stopped when she realized she couldn’t walk anywhere. She just stood stupidly and looked at everyone, in an uncomfortable silence. “Well, I’m not,” she huffed eventually and sat back down. 

The atmosphere in the van was thick after that and everyone was silent, or at least as silent as humans could be. Inside Seras was reeling, how could these people be so naive to actually believe that rubbish. How could they honestly think that movies and books were real? Dracula was an ancient warlord, he nailed hats to people’s heads and set buildings full of politicians on fire and that was when he was human! As a monster, few could equal his brutality. How could these people be so stupid? 

Admittedly he wasn’t brutal all the time, but when he wasn’t too busy being brutal he was petty and childish. Well, they would soon see things differently when they saw Alucard elbow deep inside some poor freak’s chest, laughing manically.

Seras contented herself that their illusions would be ruined once they arrived. 

End Chapter Two  
Authoress Note: Thank you for reading, please comment/review, I’d love to hear what you think.

For information on published works and upcoming projects, release dates, as well as weekly blogs, check out www . katiemariewriter . co . uk


	3. Chapter Three

Expectations.

Disclaimer: Hellsing belongs people who are not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create. Although I would like to own Alucard . . . then he’d be mine.   
Rating: G  
Authoress Note: Seras decides that Alucard is not ‘Dracula’. AU setting/Cannon divergence – Seras realises Alucard is Dracula shortly after the Valentines attack. Before Brazil. 

* \/ * /\ * \/ * /\ *

However, the reaction to Alucard elbow deep in some poor freak’s chest was not what Seras had hoped. 

“Wow red really suits him,” Gemma said quietly. But Seras had good hearing and nearly tripped over her own gun at the words. She turned to look at her master, just in case she had missed something. But no, he was grinning like a savage idiot as the freak dusted around his arms. He looked up feeling eyes on him and his smile changed to something a little calmer and he walked to Seras. 

“You're mad again,” he said, raising an eyebrow at Seras’ expression. 

“Apparently red suits you,” Seras said, her voice shaking with irritated confusion. Alucard grinned. 

“Of course it does,” he dipped his head to his fledgeling and Seras ignored the recruit’s reaction. 

“You’re doing this on purpose,” Seras growled, Alucard laughed and nodded. “Just to irritate me?”

“Partly, but no, not really,” Alucard said. 

“Then why? What else could you possibly get from this?” Seras snapped.

“You can be oblivious at times,” Alucard said. “Do you think you are the only one who doesn’t want people to run in fear when they see you? Even I get tired of people being afraid all the time.”

“But … but you enjoy scaring people,” Seras said frowning. Alucard shrugged, a small lift of his shoulder.

“I won’t deny that it is fun. But sometimes one will crave conversation,” Alucard said.

“But you’re not talking to them,” Seras snapped. “You’re letting them go all star struck and gush all over you.” 

“You really are dumb,” Alucard growled at her. Seras growled right back then caught herself and stopped. Her anger at him was overriding her usual healthy level of fear and had been for some time. 

“Maybe if you just told me,” she huffed. 

“You realise this is possibly the longest conversation we’ve had?” Alucard said after a long silent moment. 

“What’s that got to do with…oh,” Seras said. 

“Idiot,” Alucard muttered and turned away, heading towards the run-down warehouse where the group of freaks had congregated. He walked through the crowd of Hellsing troops ignoring the cries of alarm.

“We haven’t got the doors open yet!” Pip called out as Alucard walked up to the main gate. The troops had been placing select explosives. Alucard ignored them and phased through the door. “One way to do it,” Pip muttered. 

Seras waited for them to blow the door before heading in after her master. She found him on the second floor, casually murdering his way through ghouls. 

“You know if you wanted someone to talk to you could have just said,” Seras said. Alucard said nothing. “You didn’t have to make me mad.” Her master snorted at her, “and I thought I was socially bad,” Seras muttered, “but you're terrible.” 

“Pay attention,” Alucard snapped as a small hoard of ghouls shattered a door to Seras’ left and swarmed out. 

“I bloody hate ghouls,” Seras said putting some distance between her and the small group before opening fire. 

“No one would ever choose to become one,” Alucard said as the last fell. “A quick death is a mercy.” 

“So, you’ve said,” Seras muttered, then looking up at him, glaring. “You didn’t need to do that with the recruits.” Alucard shrugged once again and smiled, a softer smile this time. 

“After years of fear and hatred a little admiration is nice,” he admitted.

“I’m not afraid of you.” She said quietly as they entered the building. 

“You are,” Alucard looked around sniffing quietly at the air before moving upstairs. “You’re getting a little better at hiding it but you are afraid.” 

“Well I’d have to be stupid not to be,” Seras said. “But I’m not just afraid anymore, not like I was. I wouldn’t have gotten mad at you if I was just afraid.” 

“You were really that angry?” Alucard said without turning around. 

“Yes, all that romantic bollocks about vampires … it really frustrates me. Vampires eat people they don’t date them.” 

“You think we’re incapable of appreciating humans as anything other than a food source?” Alucard said heading right as the hallway met with another. 

“No,” Seras said slowly, she was friends with Walter, and it seemed Alucard was as well, but that wasn’t the same. “But it’s … I can’t put it into words but it’s not the same.” 

“It is not common,” Alucard said. “Our situation here at Hellsing is not common. It is not impossible for us to look past our basic instincts and see the capacity humans have for complex emotions but then humans do the same thing with animals.” 

“I suppose, but I don’t see Walter or Integra as lesser because they’re human. But at the same time, I don’t look at humans and see dating material.” Seras winced as Alucard laughed. 

“As I said there are exceptions and ours is an exceptional situation, were our situation different then you may have a different opinion. But no, humans are not cattle who are fit only for food but also, they are not, as a whole, dating material.” 

“Sounds weird when you say that,” Seras admitted.

“Some humans strive hard and deserve to be elevated to the ranks of a No-Life King, but many do not. Again, it is the exception, not the rule.” Alucard said kicking a door down, Ghouls flooded out and Seras fell into the practised motion of aim and fire. Pointedly ignoring the fierce burst of joy every time, she struck one down. 

“I’m so confused,” she said when the job was done. 

“Likewise,” Alucard glanced at her and smirked. “You were so angry.” 

“They think you’re …” she started but Alucard held up a hand.

“I know what they think and you know they are wrong, yet it bothered you greatly. Why?” 

“I don’t know,” Seras shrugged. “Maybe because I know they won't last five minutes here with that kind of mindset and already I grow tired of watching humans die.” Alucard raised an eyebrow at her. 

“I don’t think so,” he said. “But come now, the freak has come up from the basement. Your fool recruits will be facing it soon.” 

“It was in the basement?” Seras snapped. “Then why did we come up here?” Alucard just grinned at her. 

When they made it outside the freak had already killed two of the recruits, the Wild Geese had pulled back, but the recruits seemed to be slower to react. Seras couldn’t help but wonder if that was because of the Geese’s healthy respect for vampires established on her first meeting with them. Or if it was just bad luck. 

Seras moved forwards and crouched to take aim, the Harkonnen was an amazing gun but it took a moment to ready. Her master was faster, but he didn’t use his gun, instead, he lost his form and emerged as a seething mass of eyes and teeth around the freak, inches away from the new recruits and tore the freak to shreds, very slowly. 

Seras grinned and flinched when she realised the freaks drawn out and far-more-bloody-than-needed death was causing her pleasure as well as the terrified expression on the recruits faces as they watched unable to look away until they started throwing up. 

Seras kept her smile as her master reformed and tilted his head at her. 

“Thank you,” she said. 

End Chapter Three

Authoress Note: Thank you for reading, please comment/review, I’d love to hear what you think.

For information on published works and upcoming projects, release dates, as well as weekly blogs, check out www . katiemariewriter . co . uk


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alucard is a bad dog.

“You realise this will end in tears,” Alucard muttered looking exhausted. “Your tears.” 

“So, you keep saying,” Seras said. “But it worked before.” 

“When?” Alucard scoffed. “Tell me when we did this exact thing previously?” 

“When the Wild Geese joined, it worked well then,” Seras glared at her master. Alucard met her stare and held it for a moment before smirking. “What!” 

“I remember that very differently to you,” he leaned back. “I recall you demonstrating your physical strength by prodding the captain,”

“Well, I flicked him,” Seras said. 

“I came in …” Alucard continued. 

“Through the wall,” Seras interrupted, Alucard nodded. 

“And the vast majority of them soiled themselves,” he finished, Seras smiled. “At no point did anyone shoot me.” 

“We need to teach them what they are up against,” Seras pinched the bridge of her nose. “Right now, they’re still making goo-goo eyes at you, they aren’t afraid enough.”

“Goo-goo eyes?” Alucard frowned.

“Bedroom eyes,” Seras elaborated. “What happens if they make bedroom eyes at some freak, it’s not going to be as amused about it as you are, it will just kill them.” 

“Correct,” Alucard nodded. “But you do realise that there are certain kinds of stupid you cannot cure?” 

“This is not one of those kinds,” Seras said. “We can fix this.” 

“By encouraging them to shot at you?” Alucard said.

“I’ll show them that for us getting shot isn’t as big a deal as it is for a human, it will frighten them, make them more aware of what they are facing.” 

“It won't work,” Alucard said firmly. 

“Why not,” Seras snapped. “They just need a bit of further education, the last stunt helped, they’re keeping their distance from you now but they still look at you like lovesick teenagers.” 

“It won’t work,” Alucard said slowly. “Because you are overestimating yourself.” Seras opened her mouth to argue. “Getting shot hurts, regardless of your species.”

“I’ve been shot before, by you,” Seras said.

“And you recall this do you?” Alucard said. 

“It didn’t hurt,” Seras said. 

“Because your body went into shock,” Alucard snapped. 

“You laugh off bullet wounds all the time,” Seras said.

“They still hurt,” Alucard rolled his eyes. “But I can heal them in moments, so the pain is there and gone again, and it's not the gunshot wounds that are funny it’s the reaction when gunshot wounds don’t stop me.” 

“I’ll heal,” Seras said quieter now. 

“Yes, if you avoid getting shot in the heart or the head, you will heal. But it will take hours.” 

“What!” Seras snapped. Alucard looked for a moment like he would bang his head off a wall, Seras noticed that for a split second his expression was almost identical to one Integra wore often. 

“You’re an infant,” Alucard said very slowly. “An infant who won’t eat properly I might add. You will heal and you will do so faster than a human but do not expect to heal instantly.” 

“So getting shot,” Seras said slowly.

“Will cripple you, quickly,” Alucard said seeming relieved that the message was finally sinking in. “It won’t be scary, it will be sad.” 

“Shit,” Seras sighed. She brightened quickly as an idea struck. “What did you do to the guy in the basement?” 

“What?” Alucard asked. 

“When the ghouls attacked headquarters, we could hear you over the intercom, he called you a monster then there was a lot of screaming.” Seras blushed, “I don’t remember much of it, but the council were all very uncomfortable afterwards and I doubt it was me they were afraid of.” 

“You tore apart ghouls on their doorstep,” Alucard reminded her, looking pleased.

“But Integra stopped me, then I threw up.” Alucard looked less pleased. 

“I see.” He said slowly with an air of disappointment. “To answer your question I ate him.”

“Ah, well, we can’t do that,” Seras said.

“Integra would disapprove,” Alucard nodded. “We’d never hear the end of it.”

“Really, you behave because you’re worried about her nagging,” Seras snorted. Alucard shook his head but did not elaborate, Seras felt the tension in the room rise and coughed awkwardly. “We need to do something.” 

“Why?” Alucard shrugged.

“Because I’m fed up watching people die, its bad enough when it happens at all but I don’t think I could stomach it if it happened because they were dumb.” 

“Seems like you can’t stomach much,” Alucard muttered. Seras glared at him, he glared back at her but after a moment his expression softened and he smiled. “Which could solve your conundrum.” 

“I doubt me vomiting will scare the recruits,” Seras said, feeling sorry for herself. 

“No,” Alucard agreed. “But your almost as naive as they are and Integra has been ‘nagging’ at me to train you better.” 

“I’m not naïve!” Seras snapped. 

“I was being charitable,” Alucard snorted. “But tell me where should your stupid humans be now?” 

“In the mess hall probably,” Seras said, her master's grin was getting bigger and she was starting to feel deeply uncomfortable. 

“I think it’s time we improved your combat tactics, indoors, at close range.” 

* * *

“I don’t think I like this job,” Gemma said. 

“What do you mean?” Harry asked. “You were right keen on this one.” 

“Yeah but I don’t know, I thought the whole fighting monsters thing would be cool, like in the movies, but it wasn’t cool.” 

“You really thought it would be cool?” Harry said. “Fighting is fighting regardless of who it’s against, it's not cool, its nothing like the movies and you know this, you’ve been part of the troop now for five years.” 

“I know, but we weren’t raiding a village or fighting insurgents, we were fighting monsters, and hell we were fighting with Dracula. Sounds like something out of a story, it should have been cool or at least … I don’t know.” Gemma sighed. 

“Disappointed?” Pip asked walking passed the table the recruits were gathered around. 

“A little yes,” Gemma said. “I re-read the book when I learned where we were going to be working and I expected something a little more…”

“Lace nightdresses and capes?” Harry asked. Gemma blushed. 

“Maybe,” she admitted. 

“Seras would look good in a lace nightdress,” Pip said but stopped and frowned before he could say more. “What is that sound?” he walked towards the entrance to the mess hall and was knocked flat on his back when Seras barrelled through the door. 

“This isn’t funny!” she was yelling as she bolted across the hall followed by the seething black mass of eyes, teeth and laughter that was her master. 

“What the fuck?” Harry scrambled out of his chair as Seras lifted a pistol from the table she was now standing on and fired a few brief shots. Her master stopped laughing and semi emerged from the mass of shadows. 

“Really?” he said to his fledgeling before shadows emerged underneath Seras knocking her off her feet. She hit the ground hard and yelped rolling out of the way when her Harkonnen fell from the shadows and landed heavily behind her. 

“I can’t use this indoors!” she yelled. 

“You’re in trouble then,” Alucard’s voice came from the shadows as they sunk into the floor, disappearing. The hall was silent for a long moment before a table by the door, long enough to seat twelve men was upended. The table shot directly upwards several feet before landing upside down. Then the next table did exactly the same. 

“What’s going on?” Gemma yelled. 

“Everybody out!” Pip called over the deafening clatter as Alucard trashed his way through the mess hall towards his fledgeling. 

“I can’t even bloody see you!” Seras yelled as people ran for the door only to be stopped when two of the upturned tables were thrown at the door. 

“Fuck,” Pip snapped. “Oi monster you want to harass each other then fine but let us out first.” 

“What’s he doing?” Harry said to Pip who was ordering his men up against the walls. 

“I don’t know I …” Pip stopped, taking a moment to see what Alucard had done to the mess hall, all the tables were upturned and thrown against the walls. There was a big empty space in the centre of the hall. “He’s making space?” Pip said. 

“This isn’t funny,” Seras snapped when Alucard’s laughter came from the shadows along the walls. The shadows moved seamlessly into the centre of the room and wavered for a moment before the hellhound stepped out. 

“What the fuck is that thing,” Gemma shouted. 

“That’s the wolf you were petting yesterday,” Seras couldn’t help herself from yelling. She dodged backwards as the oversized K9 form with far too many eyes and teeth lunged at her. She wasn’t fast enough and shouted when teeth closed on her arm, and she was lifted off her feet. She felt the wind go out of her when she struck the wall, thrown across the hall by the hound. 

“Try harder,” the voice of her master came from the beast. Seras had only a moment to blink the flashes out of her vision before the hound ran at her. She managed to roll away and the beast went through the wall. 

“What the fuck is he doing!” Pip yelled when Alucard was gone, running across to Seras. 

“Practice,” Seras managed, still winded from the blow against the wall. “Close combat against freaks within a civilian population.” 

“Oh… shit.” Pip said. “Well, I’m not a civilian.” He pulled a gun from his side holster and turned to face his men. “He’ll be back,” he shouted. “We need cover.”

“What’s going on captain!” one of the men called. 

“Don’t care,” Pip said. “Pull those tables down now.” The men snapped to the task, pulling tables away from the wall and turning them into cover. 

“Don’t?” Seras said. “Just stay by the walls, he’s not ‘teaching’ you.” 

“Shut up and help them get cover,” Pip snapped at her. “Also pick up the damned cannon.” 

“It’ll destroy the room,” Seras said.

“We can blame the fucking monster for that,” Pip said. “You’ve got twenty eyewitnesses of an unprovoked attack.” 

“It’s not an attack,” Seras snapped and was blindsided when the hound emerged from the floor and knocked her across the room. The blow caught Pip sending him rolling. 

“Get behind cover!” Pip yelled getting to his feet and running as fast as his bruised body would move. 

“The girls still out there,” one of the men snapped when Pip made it behind the tables. 

“Master this isn’t funny,” Seras was repeating, she glanced at the men hiding behind upturned tables and frowned. “Get out from there,” she snapped. 

“We need cover,” Pip said. 

“You’re making more shadows,” Seras said. “That’s a bad idea.” As if to prove her point, the shadows created by the tables sprouted teeth and a ridiculous number of red eyes. 

“Shit! Move,” Pip snapped. The men surged away from the tables and stood with Seras in the centre of the room. Watching in shock as the shadows tore the tables apart. 

“That could easily have been you,” Seras said to Pip. 

“Why wasn’t it?” Pip asked Seras could hear his heart hammering. 

“Because he’s not trying to kill anyone, he’s teaching.” Seras snapped.

“Worst teacher ever,” someone from the back said, Seras had to agree. 

“Ok,” Pip swallowed and Seras had to admire him just a tiny bit, not many people could stand against her master and keep their wits. “Circle formation, I want eyes on all the shadows, when he comes, he’ll come hard and fast.” 

“I always do,” Alucard’s very amused voice came from all directions at once. 

“Really,” Seras said under her breath. “Dick jokes now?” 

“Here!” Gemma called, opening fire at the shadows in front of her. They retreated and Seras smiled noting the quiver in the girl’s voice. 

“Here,” another called out the opening fire. But the shadows did not recede this time, they surged forward as the hound. Seras had turned before she had thought to do so and fired a single shot from the Harkonnen. The hound managed to avoid the shot but it threw off his charge and the group remained untouched as the beast disappeared into the shadows once again. 

“Well done,” Alucard still sounded like he was having far to much fun for Seras liking. 

“Here!” 

“Here!” 

The cries went up simultaneously from opposite sides of the group. Both sides opened fire and two smaller hounds emerged and charged despite the gunfire. 

“What the bloody hell is going on here!” Integra’s voice cut through the gunfire and both hounds disappeared. 

Integra stood at the doorway to the mess hall, her chest heaving from having run down the hall. Everyone had turned to face her but no one said anything as she glared at everyone. 

“Alucard,” she said quietly. 

“My master,” Alucard’s voice came from behind the group, the entire group jumped, two of the men dropped their guns, and another fell over. Alucard grinned. 

“What is going on?” Integra said very slowly, her voice calm but belaying a level of anger Seras had not witnessed yet. 

“Training,” Alucard said simply. 

“Training,” Integra repeated. 

“Close quarters combat with a civilian population,” Seras spoke up. Integra turned her gaze on Seras and Seras felt her stomach form icicles. Surprisingly her master closed his hand over her shoulder and pulled her gently behind him. 

“An education to prevent needless deaths in future operations,” he said to Integra still smiling. 

“In the mess hall,” Integra said. 

“Not many freaks pop up in open fields,” Alucard said.

“We have indoor training grounds that are not the mess hall, I don’t see why …” Integra stopped herself. She took a slow breath before continuing. “I expect this room to be put to rights as much as possible, I want a report on the damage and I expect a better explanation from you two.” She snapped at her vampires. “Right now, both of you.” She turned and stalked out of the semi-destroyed mess hall. Alucard turned to his fledgeling. 

“I think that was a success,” he grinned. Seras looked at him for a long moment, before starting out after Integra.

“I can’t believe you bit me,” she snapped, her arm throbbing. 

“It was a play bite,” Alucard laughed as the soldiers watched them go. 

“You threw me into a wall, with your teeth! That’s not a play bite!” Seras snapped as they left the mess hall. “You’re a bad dog.” Pip turned to the men.

“You heard her, we need to sort this place out,” he said. 

“What was all that about?” one of his men approached and asked. 

“I don’t know and I don’t want to know.” He said firmly.

End Fic

Authoress Note: Thank you for reading, please comment/review, I’d love to hear what you think.

For information on published works and upcoming projects, release dates, as well as weekly blogs, check out www . katiemariewriter . co . uk


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